Drop it Dirtbag! False(B)logic enters the World of Law Enforcement, Let’s Play Police Quest Part One

Welcome to the LPD

Now figure it out yourself!

Police Quest begins in the central room of the Lytton Police Headquarters. That’s us, Sonny Bonds, standing there stupidly.

Not that informative. Let me fill you in the top barred window is evidence the top right door leads to the briefing room, the bottom right leads to the locker the top left door leads somewhere, I forget… Anyway as a closeted homosexual Sonny hits up the lockers first:

frustrated by society at every turn, aren’t you Sonny?

As we walk towards our locker, I assume Sonny has one, our fellow cops can’t help but blab at us:


Anyway, Sonny heads to his locker. It’s the one in the lower right and OPENS it:

Inside he finds:

Looting is the central tenet of Adventurism


With are locker deflowered we return to the locker room and the hot blonde in the shower. Sonny goes through his briefcase. An adventurer is never done looting:


Now with Sonny all geared up and ready to go he heads back to the central room:

Then, Sonny heads into the Briefing Room:

With a few minutes to spare Sonny picks up the paper lying on the table and thumbs through it:

“I love bird watching too! Oh, I had no idea I was nominated for Office of the Year!”

As soon he finished the paper the briefing begins. Initiated by a strange disembodied voice:

Having played before Sonny knows where to stand:

Let’s get this briefing on:

Hitting the Mean Streets!

Sonny jots down some NOTES from the briefing (you have to do this to get a perfect score your notes don’t have to say anything in order to get the points) Then checks his box:

Then heads out for his patrol:

As per Lytton Police Department Operating Procedures Sonny walks around his vehicle before entering it:

He gets into the car, grabs his nightstick and goes out on patrol:

This is the driving interface the important thing to remember in these screen is the location, noted at the top of the screen as C3. This is your regular grid with the alphabet on the vertical and numbers on the horizontal. We’re just going to drive around randomly until we get a radio call:

If you were paying extra attention to the pic before last you’ve already located our 11-83 (traffic collision – no details). Sonny heads there now:

What a Mess




Officer Bonds approaches the crowd of on-lookers and asks if anyone saw anyting, TALK MAN



Shortly thereafter a detective and the Sarge show up:

With the Sarge and Homicide on the scene Sonny gets back on his beat:

Remember Steve? He left a note in our box about meeting at a cafe? Probably because he yearns for Sonny’s hot, hot man bod. Guess we better head over!

Author: falselogic

Doesn’t mix well with polite company; his two favorite topics being politics and religion. Would rather be out cycling, swimming, running, or camping. Misspent his youth reading genre-fiction; today, he is making up for it by reading large quantities of non-fiction literature. The fact that truth, in every way, is more fascinating than fiction still tickles him.